Friday, January 11, 2013

I don't even have a word for how I feel.

Russia closed.

No adoptions.

No new commitments.

No no no...

Just like that.

The little girl I adore... lost.

The families I love... devastated.

My friends, left wondering if they will ever see their sons and daughters again.

Children left to rot in institutions and orphanages.

My heart wondering, if we could have gotten our act together last year... could we have saved our Sweet Girlie Girl. If I tried harder to get her a family, raised more money, blogged just one more time...

What if's, whys, and how long can this last. How many won't survive the wait.  What if it never ends...

There is no word for these feelings.

Just tears

And they are flowing .
A piece of my heart is in Russia. No, I never met her. No, we didn't commit to her. And all I have is a photo or two, but I love her like she is mine. I'll always love her...

I'll never give up on her...

I'll never give up on any of them..



Twilson9608 said...

I don't understand any of this? Why no adoptions? It sickens me!

my family said...

just dont know how this has happened. i have gone through this alot myself in my head. This damn computer down for the last 1 1/2+ months...unable to post about benji and the angel tree. im sick with and somehow think if i would have done a better job blogging he would have had a better chance at his mama finding him. UGH. I am terriblly disgusted about this entire adoption situation. i do know one thing for sure You and I and so many other may advocate but God has got this one. It is hard to let go and give it to him with all of the what ifs but we must have faith in His plan
hugs Steph
Thanks for sharing your heart