Sunday, October 6, 2013

Myths about Parents Who Have a Child with Special Needs

Continuing with Down syndrome awareness month I thought I'd address some myths about parents/parenting. Not with you "typical" parents (hehe) , but us Super Hero parents who have children with special needs. 

Well, myth #1... We're not Super Heroes (insert sad face here)

I know! I'd really love some freaking super powers. But it's not to be. Although, some parents sure make it look like they do. I'm not one of them. We're all just human, doing whatever we need to do to get through each day. No different than any other parent. 

Myth #2   God never gives you more than you can handle. 

I can barely type this without laughing. REALLY? God, on a daily basis dishes out more than I can handle. He just dishes out more grace to get me through. Seriously. Look at your days. Do you think you get a little more on your plate than you can swallow? Of course you do. God knows that, that's why He's never far from our sides.

Myth # 3  God gives special children to special parents. 

Another one that makes me giggle when I type. Well, if you call a street smart punk, with good intentions special, than I'm oozing with all sorts of specialness.We hit the jackpot simply because our butts needed saving. God saw that and sent us Em. Okay, so we weren't Bonnie and Clyde as parents but our eyes were closed to certain things. Without Em, God new the chances of our eyes ever being opened wide were slim and none. So, without our consent or approval or even our opinion on the subject, He sneaked her right into our lives and hearts.

 Myth #4 There will be days you fantasize about running away. (just for a little while)

Oh, sorry.. not a myth. But a totally acceptable feeling. 

Myth #5  A child with Down syndrome will ruin your life and take away valuable time you need to spend with your other children.

I know a woman who had an abortion because of this reason. Although my husband and I did everything in our power to persuade her otherwise she didn't believe us. When I was pregnant with Em and we found out about her Ds diagnosis, I initially thought this too. I remember thinking if she was our first child and not number five things would be better for her and for us. I was afraid she would get lost in the mix, or that my other kids would resent her for taking me "away" from them. Nothing of the sort ever happened. In fact, I now say, God placed her very well as number five. It has made her stronger, more independent, and determined! She wants to do what all the kids do. She tries everything. Nothing keeps her down. And with four older siblings we have built in speech therapists, occupational therapists and physical therapists. She has become the corner stone we all gather our strength from. 

This little peanut has done so much for us! More than we could ever do for her.

* disclaimer. The bottle was empty when she stole it from the garbage! Bonnie and Clyde finished it off..


Mardra said...


The VW's said...

Love this post.....and you too! =) Hugs!

Michelle said...

Yes, amen! I hate the myth that I'm somehow a special parent ... umm... no! I am who I was before she was born and that was not anything special! And I don't do anything 'above and beyond' - I just parent my child!