Right now I feel like I'm about to pop! So if you all don't mind I'm going to let off some steam! If you mind then maybe this post isn't for you.
Come back another day when I have something fluffy and cute to post about.
This girls time is running out! Carina is turning four next month. Four years and no one has ever asked about her!
Why because she's not smiling? Well seriously people, do you think she looks like that all the time? Can't you use your imagination and just see her gorgeous smile, the twinkle in her eye?
My head hurts from trying to think of ways to make everyone see what I see when I look at her.
She is a stunning beauty!
She has over 4000.00 in her account.
She is perfect. Damn it why is she still waiting!!!!!!!!!!!!!
When I picked Carina, to be a Reece's Rainbow Warrior for, I really thought she's be scooped up quickly. In November when I chose her, I really thought that by April, she would be well on her way home.
I NEVER thought she's still be sitting , and waiting and not even have one inquiry!!!
This pisses me off! Why are people looking past her? Has anyone ever even lingered at her photo??
And you know what else kind of gets me in a tither! Why in the hell did God go and turn my heart into mush for these kids when I cannot do damn thing for them!!!!
Why did He let me fall in love with children I can never have, never hold. And on top of it I cannot even financially do squat for them because we are barley keeping a roof over our heads!
God asks too much sometimes! He expects too much!
I'm so freaking mad today!
If we qualified Carina would be coming home! And Samantha and Kristina!
I'm sick of hearing people say,"I wish I could do something"
When I hear that, it seriously makes me want to throw up!!!!!
Then get off your a$$ and do something! Anything is better than nothing! Can you write, can you form words , than you can do something!!!! Write , blog, make an effort! Don't just "wish" you could do something.
EVERYONE BREATHING CAN DO SOMETHING!
That's why you are still breathing!!!
God's not ready for you yet, because you still have something to do!!!!
And believe me I'm not speaking to any one in particular! No one I know has gotten me into this mood. So please don't take this post personally! Just pretend we're out having coffee... or something stronger! You can even add your thoughts. I'm just venting to the only friends who understand!
Because that's another thing!
NO ONE FREAKIN GETS IT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! No one wants to hear it!
My husband gets it, but that poor thing , "get's it " from me every day! He deserves a break.
What do people do if the subject comes up? I get ... "Oh those poor babies", then in the next breath, " Oh, guess what I just bought (that I spent too much money on and don't really need and will end up in the back of my closet, but sorry I can't donate right now, because we're saving money to spend on more things we don't need and will never use) Kiss kiss bye, bye, talk to you later,let me know if I can help, love you! "
And no I'm not against buying things! And I'm not judging people who do.I love shopping! What makes me crazy is that those are usually the people who won't part with five dollars, because they just can't afford it. But they have a carload of crap they just bought at the mall, and are making plans to go out for dinner.
I hate that!!!!!
I think the throbbing in my head is subsiding. I'm still ticked but I so needed this venting session!
If you stuck with me to the end, thanks. I really didn't expect anyone to read all the way through. I really just needed to get this all off my chest.
The only ones home right now are Andrew, Emmie and the cat. And I wasn't going to hold their attention with any of this.
I guess everyone has days like this. I have many but usually can shake it off. But sometimes that crazy Italian blood I've got starts to boil. Ok, lots of times! But Peter is usually around to use as a punching bag.
Thanks for rolling with me today!
And please say a quick prayer for Carina. I know at any second God can move all mountains and bring her home! There is always hope, I just don't want her to see the inside of an institution, not even for a second!